Adulting:

“Supposing a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?’ ‘Supposing it didn’t,’ said Pooh after careful thought. Piglet was comforted by this.”
 
“Who knew receiving would be so hard,” said Chelsea. When she found the house that she wanted, it felt both natural and crazy-scary. It was everything and way more than she imagined. She’d done it. 
 
But then she started asking versions of Piglet’s question to Pooh. What if the worst happens? Is this financially wise? How hard will we have to work to maintain the mortgage? Am I being materialistic? What about the judgment or jealousy of others?
 
In the world of material things, all energy, it doesn’t matter whether you’re aiming for a castle or a rug to lay on, simply that you are true to you and your deepest desires and integrity with the universe, the only place the richest of relationships can take place. 
 
This relationship must necessarily mature from a parent-child style of relating to a partnership where you are in this together. It’s like a dance where you play off of each other; pay attention to the signals for the next move; give clear signals for the next move; sense the other’s energy rather than being self-absorbed; and surrender to the energy that envelops both of you even while you are creating it called, the relationship.
 
You are simultaneously creating this relationship while being held and expanded by it. Life wants to dance with you, the dance of all dances. To be in sync on each move, to feel each other’s flow without anticipating it. To be in the flow, like a dance. To roll out of so-called mistakes and create some more. Keep dancing!
 
You may walk through phases of feeling in competition with others, like the car ride of sibling rivalries. “Mom, Bosco took my seat!” “I want to sit there!” “I didn’t do it!” “Stop touching me!” But that is not the life of partnership. It’s life before sovereignty, before adulthood, before mutuality and the recognition of your ability and worthiness to create your life.
 
And, it is a life of scarcity…what if I never get my turn? What if Bosco is mom’s favorite? Like Pooh said, what if he’s not? And what if your turn is ever present? Chelsea can say yes to the house that stretches her because it’s the alignment with life, a partnership, a receiving beyond what she could have imagined.
 
Adulting is coming into partnership with the life force moving in you, through you, and as you. Perhaps the last part of that sentence—as you—is most significant, because it points to the relationship you have with yourself, your self-connection, from which all other relationships flow—with your business, your dog, your significant other, your children, your customers, your past/present/future.
 
In partnership with life, there is no shortage of love, of front seats, of resources of any kind. This is the relationship you develop with yourself and, with Life. There is no shortage of resources, only the maturing of your ability to receive it, to sense it, to align with it, to give to it, to be in integrity with it, to feel through saying yes or not, to communicate with it. 
 
Every one of us has “stuff” to transform to be able to love, be loved and create from that dynamic as well as continually expand your capacity for that love. Thankfully, there is no shortage of capacity. No shortage of awe. No shortage of creating. No shortage.
 
While listening to music and dancing the other night, a new acquaintance was speaking of living in the quantum, of learning Carl Jung and shedding who you are not. It’s so hard he reflected. Not that it doesn’t feel hard sometimes, but he was focused on trying to change through mental effort.  He hadn’t discovered the partnership in life, in energy.
 
Meanwhile, I went for a dance with a guy who could signal clearly where we were going next. If I missed it, or if he missed me, we simply rolled into some other move that looked totally on purpose. Because it was! 
 
What is key to remember when you choose to engage life in partnership is that you are not losing yourself to something outside yourself. In fact, you are not losing yourself at all. You are gaining yourself and connecting with what is always within you.

“Genius is becoming who you were all along.” ~David Whyte, Poet 

As a partner instead of a child, you now engage and embrace the relationship as of your own making. You’re driving the car. You are the car. The life-force fuels it. And you choose whether to fill it up.
 

Here’s to more of You in this world, 

Shelley